How To get A Woman To Stay After She Says She Has To Go. Dating and seduction tips for men

How To get A Woman To Stay After She Says She Has To Go. Dating and seduction tips for men

When most men are talking to a woman and she chirps “I've gotta go,” they take it as a threat that she's about to leave.

They'll either beg her to stay or let her walk away because…

They think she isn't kidding about leaving.

But I've got news for you, my friend…

95% of the time it's easier than tying your shoe to get a woman to stay – even when she tells you, “I need to leave, now!”

Here's what to do...

If you're talkin' to a woman and she says, “I've gotta go help my guinea pig deal with the angst of post industrial madness,” respond with: “I've gotta go in a minute myself.”

Then say something to rivet her attention: maybe share a funny story, show her something interesting, or hint that you know something about her without letting her know what it is.

When you sense you've got her fully engaged, pounce. Stick your fangs into her jugular by bellowing…

“Go! You've got to help your guinea pig deal with the angst of post industrial madness! Leave right now. Hurry! Hurry along!”

Here's what'll happen 95% of the time…

She'll stand their like a dumb deer in headlights, not knowing how to react… but wanting to stay.

Let's plunge into the psychology behind this secret…

The unconscious mind is like an A.D.D. child. It cannot gauge what will be best for it in the long run. All it cares about is what feels good right now.

Whenever you force the unconscious mind to decide between two choices it almost always chooses the one that feels most pleasurable in that moment.

Let's look at an example...

Have you ever had plans to do something really fun, something you were looking forward to, but you almost missed out because you got distracted by some show on TV?

Rationally you knew better. But because the TV show was the source of yout pleasure at that moment, your unconscious mind chose it over your plans.

You might have followed through on your plans.

But I’m willing to bet you felt an urge to watch the show instead.

Same holds true for the girl you're talking to. She might have a date with Johnny Depp. Maybe she's going to collect her lottery winnings.

But because her unconscious mind is receiving more pleasure from you in that moment, a part of her is compelled to stay.

Here's something else cool…

The conscious mind justifies what the unconscious mind decides.

As you became more enthralled by the TV show, do you remember thoughts running through your mind like, "Oh... I'll just finish the show. It doesn't matter that much if I am a couple minutes late."?

Your conscious mind was attempting to justify your unconscious mind's decision.

Can you guess why this is useful?

When she unconsciously decides to stay, she consciously thinks to herself: “Wow, gee... this guy's kinda interesting... I guess I can stay a few extra minutes.”

But this barely scratches the surface of what's going on here.

The power lies in using a psychologically deadly form of push-pull that taps into neurological hardwiring in a woman's brain.

Push-Pull is whenever you emotionally push a woman away from you…and, then, emotionally pull her back in. Each Push creates an emotional space for each Pull.

To get a sense of what I'm getting at, think, for example, of your favorite junk food. What if you went on a strict diet for several weeks, depriving yourself of giving in to that urge to chow down on your favorite food? What would it be like to finally give in to your urge and indulge?

I'm willing to bet it would be more intense than if you hadn't gone on your strict diet, yes?

Now imagine in the midst of enjoying your favorite food a person yanking it away from you.

Annoying, yes? But I'm willing to bet, your desire for the food would grow exponentially.

Same thing is true here…

By engaging the woman, putting her in a good state, you're pulling her into you.

And then… by insisting that she leave through using her own reasons back on her, you're pushing her away, compelling her to emotionally crave you.

Doing this is firing off one of dozens of compliance triggers hardwired into a woman's brain.

Possessing the knowledge and skills to fire off these compliance triggers is what separates the men from the boys. It distinguishes those who get what they want from those who piddle around experiencing haphazard results at best.

Because I want you to be successful with women, I've put together a course called Sexual Connections where I transplant the knowledge and skills for firing off these compliance triggers into your brain.

Learn how to attract women:
Read moreLearn more: The Secrets of the Alpha Male

What Should You Do When A Woman Pushes You Away?

What Should You Do When A Woman Pushes You Away? Dating and Seduction tips for men.

QUESTION FROM A READER:

Carlos....man, do I have a good one for you. I have been using your Alpha Man Persuasion and conversation, for a little over a week now, and it has almost rectified a sour situation.

I live in Chile, South America. I have lived here for about a month and a half. I have been dating this GORGEOUS 23 year old. Yes, I know red flag because she's still a little young and doesn't quite know what she wants yet. Also she has only been in one other relationship before me, for like 5 years, and it ended like 3 months ago.

Everything was going fantastic until a week ago... [We had a one night stand.] She broke down crying and said she had many problems with her heart still (in spanish of course) from the previous relationship. It was quite the bummer.

Now since then we have gone from that to slowing down, to full on dating again, yet she is still hesistant to have the type of close encounters that led up to the night that changed everything.

I don't understand this. The sexual tension is so strong some times you could cut it with a knife. I have tons of Rapport, I can make her laugh always, I'm definitely an Alpha Man, and I'm wondering if there's anything I can do to help win her emotions over, finally and fully.

I have been talking to and dating other women, so I haven't put all my eggs in one basket with this one.

What should I do?

- Rob P., South America

______________________
CARLOS XUMA ANSWERS:

I really like getting questions like this from around the globe, because it only points out just how consistent women are in behavior, no matter what country.

And it's nice to know that the Alpha Conversation Program can cross language barriers, too!

Now, for your problem, let me tell you a story you'll understand...

A few years back, I bought a very expensive plasma screen television. I'm not going to advertise how much I spent, but it was more than some people pay for their cars. (I'm a movie nut, and I like a big screen for my home theater.)

Well, I did a lot of research, and then I ordered it online.

About an hour after the transaction went through, I felt this panic overtake me...

o "Did I do the right thing?"

o "Man... I shouldn't have done that..."

o "Can I afford this?"

o "I should cancel the order..."

This is commonly referred to as "buyer's remorse."

One of the most common reactions a person will feel after making a big purchase is the "oh, crap... I shouldn't have done that" feeling.

After the impulse to buy has been satisfied, the emotional hole leaves all kinds of room for regret to sneak in and take you over.

The same exact feeling happens to a woman who has slept with a guy. Even more so if she has not had much time to get to know him and really establish a firm sense of trust.

She's wondering:

o "Did I do the right thing?"

o "Hmmm... I shouldn't have done that..."

o "Can I afford to risk my heart on him?"

o "I should break it off now..."

o "Am I a slut?"

And the list goes on and on...

You have to realize that a woman's primary focus is on her assurance of support if something were to "happen" after she slept with you. Guys have a small risk compared with a woman's risk of 9 months and another mouth to feed.

Ya dig?

(And that's why your remark about "putting your eggs in one basket" is more true than you realize... :)

This girl was just in a relationship that lasted 5 YEARS, my friend. And she's only 3 months out of it. She's going to have some intimacy issues until she's over that one.

My first question for you is simply this: WHY do you need to win her emotions over, "finally and fully"?

Is it because you just need to "conquer" this one girl?

Because I'm wondering if you are truly heeding the voice in your head or the voice in your OTHER head.

You know she's young and inexperienced, and is very unlikely to want to settle down right away. You know she's very attractive and is a hot commodity. You know she's got trust issues from a relationship that is just barely over.

My thoughts?

You view HER as a prize because of her beauty, and you're not in far enough to see that this girl also has many liabilities. Maybe even more than her looks can offset.

Remember, the single most important decision a man will make is the woman he chooses as a partner. Most guys spend less time selecting a woman than they do their picks in fantasy football.

Don't be one of those guys, because you will live to regret it.Secrets of inner game and self confidence

Be more cautious with her. Think in terms of DISqualification rather than just doing everything you can to pull her into your life. If you do that, you'll also find the side benefit that she will probably be more likely to let you into her "heart problems."

By the way, this is the standard excuse that a woman will give you when she's really saying:

"We went too fast, and now I need to slam on the brakes. But rather than make you feel rejected and risk feeling like I was a 'bad girl' for what I did, I'll point the blame at some mysterious 'heart problem.' so I can avoid feeling bad."

I'm not being malicious towards women here. In fact, I just got an email over the weekend from a female model friend of mine who has the same problem with a guy in her life. Guys use this reason to push women away, too.

Generally speaking, women usually don't have any issues related to other guys when they talk about these "heart" issues. It's just a convenient excuse that guys will accept and not feel rejected after they hear it.

The point here is that you are probably addicted to the challenge of "conquering" this hot woman than you are of making a real relationship. Guys most often do this when they feel that they're losing something valuable. Even if that value was based solely on her appearance.

You're more afraid of losing her than you are actually wanting the relationship.

Scarcity is tricking you, my friend.

Go make a list of all the other things she adds to your life and I think you'll find that your pencil hardly moves.

Go back to looking at all the other possibilities you've got in your life right now, and let the woman with the most desire and the "real deal" stand up and wave her hands to be Ms. Right. Let her get your attention and prove it to YOU.

Now if you genuinely want to go further with this woman, here's where I suggest you get started. It sounds like you have some of these taken care of, but maybe not all in the right direction.

Learn how to attract women:
Read moreLearn more: The Secrets of the Alpha Male

Seduction Tip: Play Hard to get women? THREE STEPS TO GET BACK WITH A WOMAN WHO PULLS AWAY.

Seduction Tip: Play Hard to get women? THREE STEPS TO GET BACK WITH A WOMAN WHO PULLS AWAY.

1) YOU slow down the pace.

Now that you're back to dating regularly again, you must be the one to demonstrate some doubt and put the brakes on yourself.

Of course, in a lot of other dating situations, she cools off and the guy is left desperately scrambling to get her to even see him again, but either way, it calls for some restraint.

I talk about this quite a bit in my ebooks, but your best demonstration of strength and Alpha Confidence comes when you show her that you have self-discipline and self-control. It will then give her the space she needs to desire you again.

Let me say this again, because it is such an important concept:

A woman will want you again when she feels like there is nothing pushing her to you.

It's a simple psychological principle that has worked for me with EVERY woman that expressed hesitation about getting together and getting physical. All you need to do is give her the emotional experience of uncertainty to re-awaken her desire.

Just say something like:

"You know, I've been thinking that maybe we're moving forward pretty quick. I'd like to slow it down a little and make sure we can just be friends first. You know what I mean?"

This will relax her, and then you keep marching forward.

Of course we know that you never try to just be "friends first" with a woman that you're intimately connected to. It just doesn't work. But you want to create the space for her to understand that you won't be pressuring her.

This will create the space where you can then...


2) Establish trust and rapport.

The one thing she's looking for before she goes forward with you physically is that she can TRUST you. So you must show her that you are a reliable (but not boring) guy.

Take her out with some friends of yours that you've known for a while and are fun. I've found this a great way to demonstrate my social value as well as get her out of the same old mindset.

ALPHA FORMULA #1: Rapport is NOT equal to TRUST.

Rapport LEADS to trust, but does not guarantee it.

Rapport and trust are not exactly the same thing. It's up to you to find out where her current trust issues are and eliminate them.

Don't ask here where they are, either. All you can do is show her some vulnerability, and that she is not just someone you're out to score with. Maybe even a little time.

Oh, yes, this is something every "pickup artist" on the planet fears, but is ultimately more honest and compelling than the "command & conquer" method of trying to control a woman.

ALPHA FORMULA #2: Vulnerable does NOT equal WUSS.

It simply means being secure enough to demonstrate rapport by revealing common emotions to her.

Of course you also want to...

3) Switch gears back to having FUN as fast as you can.

The one thing I discovered that had the most impact on making women interested in getting physical with me again was to get her to have FUN with me.

A woman's emotional experience and sexual attraction with you is directly related to how much fun she feels when she's with you.

The more I got her active and out of her head, the less I was "serious" and pushing to move forward in a relationship, the more I found that she wanted attention and time from me.

And, the reverse was true. The more I felt like she was slipping away and the harder I worked to "fix" things, the more I actually sabotaged the good vibe we had together. Secrets of inner game and self confidence

When she's having fun, she has nothing else to worry about.

When she's having fun, she's not in her head.

When she's having fun, she's connecting on a very intense level with you.

Learn how to attract women:
Read moreLearn more: The Secrets of the Alpha Male

Being cocky playful with women helps create attraction and sexual tension.

Being cocky playful with women helps create attraction and sexual tension. Establish the frame of sexual relationship early on.

Being Playful to create attraction and sexual tension with any woman using Push and Pull, Dating Advice and Tips.
Push Pull forms an integral part of my game. I suggest everyone start to learn, understand and put it into practice. I remember when I first started using it, my game shot up astranomically. Credited Swinggcat explains push pull in this article.

Advice: Create attraction with any woman using Push and Pull.
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Important Note: Read this newsletter in its entirety because you're going to learn an attraction secret that less than one percent of the world's male population knows about

The other day I was talking to a buddy of mine, a real rock star at attracting women, about, of all things, Bill Gates. We were discussing how Gates' financial problems are vastly different from the average person. Bill spends his days fretting over ways to either make more money or sustain the money he has, while most people concern themselves with making money in the first place. The man lives in a completely different reality from most of us. As we were chatting about Mr. Microsoft, something dawned on us...

When it comes to succeeding with women, we realized, we live in a very different reality from most men. In our reality, generating attraction in women is as easy as taking a crap - little effort, yet feels great! The skills and tools for generating attraction are so ingrained in us that when interacting with gorgeous women, there's not even an iota of hemming and hawing over how to attract them. Our focus, instead, is on: using the attraction we already know we can generate in them to get our intended outcome. If there's a woman we're interested in, for example, we don't stand there stiff and stupefied, like a deer caught in headlights, wondering: "How in the world are we going to attract her?" We know, if we just chat with her for a few minutes, it's inevitable that she'll feel attraction toward us. That's why our focus is entirely on, even if we haven't yet said a word to her, using the attraction we already know we can generate in her to get our intended outcome.

But this isn't the reality of most men. "What to do in the wake of a woman feeling attraction toward you?" is a thought never crossing the minds of many a man - and rightfully so...because most can't even generate attraction inside women in the first place

A few nights ago, for example, I was at a little bar down the street from my house. My friend and I watched a forty-something year-old distinguished looking business man play the big passive bottom to the verbal gang bang of two twenty-one year old looking, sponge-brained rhymes-with-witches. The poor bastard attempted to attract these women the only ways he knew how: buying them drinks, giving them lots of compliments, and, worst of all, asking them if they thought his clothes are cool. Funny enough, the more he did these things, the crueler the girls acted toward him. This man was a walking, talking attraction death sentence.

Can you relate? Have you ever felt, every attempt to attract a woman was actually turning her off? Or have you experienced the frustration of trying to figure out why a woman was more attracted to your friend than you? Or maybe you've brooded: Attracting women is as difficult as a blind man trying to find a bobby pin on an open football field. I dunno?

Each scenario represents the reality of not knowing how to attract women. A reality I personally overstayed my welcome. I, however, have moved far away from this reality and now reside in a place where attracting women is cake.

I'm going to share something with you only known, for the most part, by people living in a reality where attracting women is as easy as turning on a light switch. This is something I don't think I've ever talked about in a newsletter...and might never again. If you've read my book, you'll know what this is. If you've gone out and experimented with it, there's a good chance you understand the power behind it.

Before I get into this I'm going to review some attraction basics.

Realize this: Most women march through life to the rhythms of some drum most men will never hear. My job is to get you to hear those rhythms, so, you can start experiencing massive success with women. Attraction is neither how a woman judges you nor what she prefers. Women prefer men who are tall and dark and lumbered
with boa constrictor sized wieners. Think of the guys featured in Calvin Klein, Guess, and Abercrombie catalogues. That's what women prefer! This probably isn't you, and certainly isn't me. But that's okay...because...the men women prefer and the men they feel attraction for are as similar as apples are to oranges. Attraction has very little to with preference. Attraction, instead, is the emotion of a woman wanting and reaching and chasing for more of a man.

This is why you hear many a woman talking about her experiences of feeling attraction toward men whom she finds ugly or as not filling the quota for what she considers to be her type. When you've mastered the mechanisms behind generating attraction, what a woman physically thinks of you will be the least of your concerns.

One of the most effective ways I've found for generating massive amounts of attraction in women, emotionally compelling them to want and reach and chase for more of you, is what I call "Tension Loops." The best part of using Tension Loops is that they generate heaps of attraction in women...regardless of your current looks, social status, or bank account.

A Tension Loop is when you do something to create unresolved emotional tension inside a woman, increase it, release it by bringing closure to it, and then spark it all over again. This will keep her feeling the emotion of wanting and reaching and chasing for more of you.

Soap opera writers use Tension Loops to keep women enraptured in their fictitious dramas for months - sometimes years! The structure is always the same. The soap starts off with some form of conflict or drama, sparking unresolved emotional tension. Emotional tension increases up until the point of the climax. The tension, then, is released by bringing some resolution to the conflict or drama. And, finally, the show ends by sparking the tension all over again, compelling women to tune in for next week's show

Mastering the Tension Loop will give you the kind of power over women that, at first, might scare you. But if you're thinking that this is what I wanted to share with you, you're wrong.

So keep reading...

In a minute, you're going to learn a special type of Tension Loop I call "Push/Pull." If you aren't comfortable with the idea of having the power to generate attraction inside the women you desire, regardless of what they think of you, you might want to stop reading now!

What I'm about to reveal is Jedi mind *shit*. We're talking Yoda power! And you don't have to become Darth Vader to reap the benefits of Push/Pull. Every guy I've come into contact with, who is good with women, uses some form of Push/Pull.

Push/Pull is whenever you emotionally push a woman away from you...and, then, emotionally pull her back in. Each Push creates an emotional space for each Pull. To get a sense of what I'm getting at, think, for example, of your favorite junk food. What if you went on a strict diet for several weeks, depriving yourself of giving in to your urge to eat your favorite food? What would it be like to finally give in to your urge and indulge? I'm willing to bet it would be more intense than if you hadn't gone on your strict diet, yes?

Many women are natural Push/Pull artists. Over the years I've heard dozens of stories from hapless men about women using Push/Pull to pick them up by the scruff of their proverbial neck, slamming their bodies with back-and-forth and side-to-side motions into the ground. My all time favorite story is the one about the gorgeous girl sleeping with a guy and then, after sex, putting his ego on steroids by telling him, "You're the best lover I've ever had." Things, then, alas, take a self-esteem crushing turn for the worse when she undermines her praise with: "Actually, you're the fourth best lover I've ever had." The poor bastard is crushed and he is, as if he were a little worker bee, struggling to move up to the number three slot.

We can use these psychological mechanisms without being an A-hole or a Jerk. The key is to make it playful and funny. Your intention should never be to hurt a woman. Your goal is to only mess with her a bit. Do this and women will find you charming and attractive.

Here's an example of Push/Pull I've used probably over a thousand times...

At some point while interacting with a woman I might take her hand and praise, "You have the most amazing smile I've seen tonight...It makes me feel so happy inside!" She'll usually respond with, "Thank you!" Then I'll count the fingers on my other hand and say, "You know what: actually there were four other girls with really amazing smiles tonight as well. Out of them, you have the fourth best smile. I'm going to call you number four." And then I'll push away her hand. More often than not, women demand, "No!!! I want to be number one!" I'll usually retort with, "Alright, I'll promote you to number three for being feisty."

Do women find this derisive and mean? Not at all (Note: once in while you'll encounter a psychologically damaged woman who doesn't think this is cute. She is the exception and not the rule. My advice: run away from these types of women, quickly). Most women find this funny, charming, and playful. More importantly, it generates attraction: the emotion of wanting and reaching and chasing for more of you.

Push/Pull is the creme de la creme of attraction tools. Master Push/Pull and you'll leave women no choice but to feel attraction toward you...even if they're repulsed by your physical appearance. Realize that this is a newsletter and I'm only scratching the surface of Push/Pull. In my book, you'll learn six types of Push/Pull: Intentional Undermining, Guilty Conscience, Emotional Rollercoaster, Revealing & Concealing, and Good Cop/ Bad Cop. You'll discover body language techniques for using Push/Pull and read about a powerful Push/Pull secret for getting physical with a woman...even if she tells you, she's not attracted to you. My book is the only place on the planet where you'll learn about Push/Pull. This, however, only scratches the surface of what you'll gain from my attraction guide. It's a complete education on attracting women, giving you the tools to transform yourself into the kind of man women feel attraction toward. Just think what it will be like to finally have the skills and confidence to plop your butt in the driver's seat while interacting with women, giving you the power and choice to take your interactions with them in the direction you want. Start getting this area of your life taken care of right now.

***Watch Live Video How this guy pick this cute girl up (setting up date and get her phone numbers) during the day time within five minutes!***

.... LEARN more: www.puatraining.com From the best in England.
Get some training from these guys!!! You too will have the power if you have the will.

**********

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